4 days ago
Saturday, January 1, 2011
So today I was asked, "What is your New Year's resolution?" Well truthfully, I think if I were to have one (which I don't really make them, because I just want change, not so much because of the New Year) I would say mine is to fine me. This may sound silly, but in the course of this last year, I think I actually lost who I am. I lost it to the lies of this world, to stress, to un-heathly habits, to insecurities, to loneliness, to fear, ect... I could go on but I lost myself in so much this year. I don't think I really realized I had done this until this month where I was searching for who I was. I haven't been happy with myself. I hate how I look, I hate how I act, and I hate how I think. Am I not a child of God? Then why am I not acting like it. I have been stressed out, easily angered, emotional, not healthy. This is not who I really am. I am joyful, friendly, smiliey, heathly person. So I am on a journey this year to uncover that. It's been hidden for far too long. I am done with the old, in with the new. So Monday I started a excerise program, and I am changing my eating habits. I am not so much on a diet as I am just trying to make healthier choices. Also, this year I am going to be desperately searching for God. I want to be so much more in love with Him. A friend of mine is doing a marathon for clean water. I am thinking about joining. Am I scared? Yes I don't even know if I can run one mile. But I am going to try, worst thing that could happen is I don't make it. But atleast I will try. This year is going to be an awesome year of growth. I don't ever want to go back to who I was. I am moving on.