Tuesday, January 19, 2010

So I've had a lot of thoughts lately in my mind, but I haven't been able to get my thoughts down. But I think I am able to now, so here's a few things that have been on my mind lately.

First, last week I got to go to this women's retreat thing. It was awesome. Getting this opportunity to go, was amazing. During that I really felt grace. Like I didn't deserve this awesome opportunity, but I was given it anyways. I didn't do anything special, but I still got it. I think just the chance to go, helped to realize the Grace God has for me all the time. I don't deserve His grace but He gives it to me. Everyday I mess up, but He still gives me grace.

2. It's going to be hard.

During the retreat I got to talk to one of the best jr high women youth pastor. She is full of so much knowledge. (her last jr. high youth group had 500 kids in it!) Well I got to sit down and talk to her, and I asked: "What's the hardest thing about being a woman youth pastor?" Her reply: "Being a woman youth pastor." Wow what a wake up call. She basically said you need to be sure you are called to this, because if your not willing to endure,less of everything.. Money, respect..ect.. then you shouldn't do it. It was a wake up to me because I knew it was going to be hard, but I thing for the first time I really realized how hard. This was going to be a fight. But I know what God is calling me to, so I will endure it.

3. Get a routine!
I need a routine in my life. If I don't have one then I am not able to effectively complete the tasks I have. I need to get into gear, wake up, go to the gym, have quiet time, go to work, get things done I need to get done, and go to bed. I think sometimes we think routines or rituals are bad, but the more you do something the less you think about doing it, and the more you just do it. I need to have more stability in my life.

4. Dream Big

After I got back from the womens retreat, a day and a half later, I went on the Alive winter retreat. (No time for rest! haha) The Alive winter retreat was all about dreaming Big, listening to God's dreams for your life, and going after them. It was awesome. I had some time to think about what God's dreams for me, and what He wants me to do. I don't think I have it all figured out but I know somethings.
a. Be a youth pastor
b. Get married and have a family (I want 10 kids.. 5 adopted)
c. Sometime I want to spend a while in Africa.. I'm not sure how long or when
d. Love big
Those are some of the things I know I have in my heart. And I know I want to go do them!
5. Just give a rip about them!

At the womens retreat Jeanne was talking about students today, and how they are so jacked up and no one cares about them, so if you just give a rip about them, then you can make a difference in their lives. I saw this on Monday. One of my girls was really upset after fuel so I talk to her. She confessed that she hasn't been living for God lately, and my talk really convicted her. I just sat there speaking grace over her. (what a privileged!) I continually told her I loved her and I didn't look down on her and that grace covered her. I gave a rip about her. I love her and the rest of "my girls". I hope they know that. I love them all so much, I tell them all the time, so I hope they know. I want them one day to look back and know that I cared about them, because God cares about them.

I know there are so many things, but that's all I can think about right now. So I leave you with those thoughts...

Romans 8:37-39
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.